What Happens When Women Are The Breadwinners?

How can you manage your personal life when you make more money than your man? The answer is simple, don’t focus on how much money you make!


While so many women are keeping close tabs on their earrings, they are forgetting what life is truly about. What Happens when women were the breadwinners in their relationships, and their men feel like they are a second class citizen in their homes? The home begins to divide and so does the relationship.


asian couple arguing over money


Finances should never hold that much weight in a relationship to whereas your partner feels like they aren’t contributing enough, or their opinions are invalid. If you’re a team, it doesn’t matter who’s bringing in what, as long as everyone’s needs are addressed. Not simple pleasures, but necessities such as food, shelter, and life’s essentials.


man and woman arguing over money


We have to remember that we choose the person that we end up with. I always enjoyed hearing the phrase “Date above your pay grade” and never quite understood why this was even being promoted until I dated ozone that made less money than me. There are certain struggles of dating someone that doesn’t have their finances in order, or that doesn’t make enough. You might be the person that’s always responsible for ensuring that everything is taken care of, and that’s a big responsibility.


There are plenty of ways a man can contribute to a relationship without being the breadwinner. His money counts! Quality time is very important to a man when he is considered a staple in his family, but shaming a man or always bringing up the fact that he doesn’t make or contribute as much money to as you can cause severe backlash with everyone involved.


african american man reading to his daughter

The key to maneuvering these small fires is to compliment his strengths. Although he’s not making as much as you, still allow him to contribute his portion to the bills and the family needs. Yes, you may have to add a little but allowing a man to feel like a man won’t hurt you, and it’ll make him feel better about his position in your life, and in your home.


Taking on that burden can open up a can of worms if you’re not compassionate to other people’s circumstances. There are a number of reasons why a man may not be as financially inclined as their breadwinner wives.  Maybe your husband skipped on getting a degree and becoming an entrepreneur, or they are content with a regular 9-5.


Having an open mind and keeping the conversation as open as possible will allow both partners to voice their frustrations and reverse their financial game plan as many times as they need.  If you think that your partner can do better, magnify his strengths and push him closer to his purpose! There is no “I” in Team, and teamwork indeed makes the dream work.


Written By: Tamara Butler

Follow Tamara on Instagram: @uniquely humble

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