Straight From His Mouth: What Men Really Want From A Woman…Other Than Sex

As women we always seem to think we know everything about relationships, men, and what they are thinking. But the truth is…we are absolutely clueless about what goes on in a man’s mind. Believe it or not they actually want more than just sex, food, and more sex. So in order to find out what exactly is going on in these peculiar minds of theirs I took a poll on Facebook asking men “Other than sex, what do men want?”

Kelly Rowland Said it Best

“Baby ima be your MOTIVATION.” A man wants to feel like his woman can bring him up and out of any hole just by offering her ever so powerful presence. There’s a story that Michelle Obama and President Obama went in to a restaurant that was owned by one of Michelle’s ex-boyfriends. The President looked at Michelle and said “see honey if you hadn’t married me you would be the owner of this restaurant.” Michelle looks back at him and said “No…he would be the President of the United States.” Men want to feel like their woman is the motivating force driving them to be able to do anything they want to.

Darryl from Facebook said “I want my lady to motivate me. Make me feel like I’m the best thing she’s ever had. When I’m with her I want to feel like I can accomplish anything. I don’t want her to make me feel like she’s a burden.”

Get the Stick out You’re A**

Nobody likes a party pooper. It’s always nice to feel like you’re with someone who can just go with the flow. Spontaneity is a huge quality that men look for in women. If you two are on your way back from a date and you drive pass a small lake and he ask “hey, jump in with me.” The last thing you want to do is say no. Kick off those stilettos, strip down to your undies and hop in. Most men will appreciate your impulsive gesture.

Shawn T from Facebook said “One thing I want from a woman is someone who can let her hair down once and a while. I’m not saying she doesn’t like to plan some things but I hate being with a woman who can’t just go with the flow every once in a while. Just hang loose, let go, and see where the night takes us.

Rolling With the Homies

A woman who knows that every man needs guy time is like an angel sent from Heaven. Every man needs time away from his significant other to just chill and hang with his boys. If you don’t allow that or get rowdy every time he gets ready to leave then you might as well start prepping for your walking papers. Besides, you should have times where you hang out with your girls; if you don’t then you have problems far beyond my realm of expertise. Seek help chica!

Brody H. from Facebook said “A woman that encourages me to go out with my boys is a keeper. I’ve always had girlfriends that complained when I wanted to go out with the homies or to the game. When I find one who doesn’t do that, I’m keeping her.”


Strength…Independence…Reliability! These are the 3 qualities men adore in the women they marry. There’s nothing more appealing to a man than a woman with impeccable strength but someone who can still be gentle and nurturing. Someone who is independent but still allows a man to take charge and be the man, and someone who that man can rely on and expect her to do what she says she is going to do. If you possess these 3 makings then you’re on the right track.

Jovan R. from Facebook said “I love a woman with strength and independence. It’s really sexy when I see a woman come across a problem but then solve that problem with me sitting there watching. It lets me know she can handle things when I’m not around too. At the same time, I like it when she looks over and says “babe help!” HUGE turn on!

Man’s Best Friend

Women don’t realize the strain they put on their relationships when they quarrel with a man’s best friend. His best friend is a reflection of him so if you don’t like Pookie from down the block then you are ultimately saying you don’t like your man. Now I’m not saying Pookie is going to always be likable but voice your disgust and irretrievable hatred for him to your girlfriends not to your man.

J.B. From Facebook said “I broke up with my fiancé whom I dated for 4 years because she couldn’t get along with my best friend. They were always at each other’s throats. She finally gave me an ultimatum and wanted me to choose between him or her. I’ve known this dude since Pre-K; there was no way I was getting rid of him. She shot herself in the foot.

No Nags, No Nags

Ladies, ladies, ladies! Let’s stop with the nagging. One thing I’ve learned from my last relationship is that if he wants to change he will if not it’s up to us as women to decide if that’s something we can live with or if it’s time to move on. The last thing you need to do is nag him into submission. State your problem and allow him time to fix it. If it doesn’t get fixed, well that’s because he doesn’t want to. Either move on, or move out but by all means don’t hover over the problem.

Aaron K. from Facebook said “Sure, tell me when I screw up….ONCE! After that I don’t want to hear it anymore. When in doubt, always choose peace.”

A Helping Hand

This one is a little unorthodox but when one of my male friends on Facebook mentioned it I had to throw it in.  A woman who allows her man to masturbate without getting upset is apparently the greatest woman alive.

Corey Q from Facebook said “I love when a woman allows me to masturbate without getting all upset. Its practice before the big game…encourage it. I’m doing HER a favor. “

The Dream

Most women know this one which is why we go to great lengths to be beautiful, fine, sexy and all of the above. Men want to fall in love with the girl of their dreams and feel like he’s the man of her dreams. Every man has a figurative woman in their head that they someday hope to make wifey. Whether this figure has Beyonce’s body or Halle Berry’s face we will never know but there is a figure. Once a man finds that figure he also wants her to act like the woman in his dreams instead of the villain in his nightmares. There’s nothing worse than looking at a woman and saying she might be the one and then having her open her mouth and she not live up to your expectations. It’s a total dream killer.

Tenzie B. from Facebook said “What men seek is the dream. The idea of a woman we have made up in our heads. The “white buffalo” if you will! What we really want is the one that makes our world and preconceived notions come crashing down, but stays around to help us build a new one.

Porsha Deshannon

Porsha Deshannon is a freelance writer and lives in Atlanta, GA. She began her career as a journalist for The Urban News in Asheville, NC and Assistant Editor for the Hilltop News. She is an avid fashion follower and writes cutting-edge style and beauty articles that inspire women to be there absolute best.

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